Monday, September 17, 2007

fate has been really driving me to the edge lately...
everything is not wat i had hope or prayed for..
well not really everything... almost.

i truely believe god will nvr put me thru things i can't handle... or at least w/o help..BUT!!
I have come to a point where i think letting things happen might be easier on me.. rather fighting till my sanity dries out... But that's selfish... i want to fight... i want to help.. but!
i can only do so if i am allowed to do so.. You can't lead 'e way when you're blind.. blind i am for i am as lost as anyone could be..

I guess as we grow up..
1) when we take a look behind, we feel glad to have gone thru all that shit we went thru.. and a million dollars good for having to overcome it.... and then u feel invincible..
2) more complex problems crop up... and you forget all that you had done to pull thru up till now... and then you feel helpless...

we swing back and forth 1 & 2... really in my opinion its harrowing... i call it the roller coaster..
ironically, i love such joy rides .. i meant the real ones like MGM & escape...

There is the good old saying "true love is the ultimate lasting hope". Yes, it doesn't require any form of reason... cos it simply lasts... but! frankly speaking love has been the make and break for me when in need of hope...

So, when in dire need of hope or just something to cling on to in order to retain my sanity... i converse with the some supreme power i have no idea about but somewhat have a good impression and trust upon... He/she will get around to providing what i need.... i truely believe that... the keyword is.. need ... not want... It helps...

Fate has a warped sense of humor really...
cos when i asked why.. i felt like a fool.. today i feel really thankful..
I know my time is not good... but i'm still ok
That! i owe to all the testy times fate has put me thru...

FATE! taught me that we all are here to strive and go through hardship to better ourselves... or to be specific... our soul... at the end of the day... our body dies.. and our soul lives on... there is no escape from our problems. It is mandate to face it, solve it, handle it or what ever you have to do but... death is no solution... why i say so... you can come and ask me personally ... i can explain..

the best part is that i learnt about this at a very crucial point of my life... so crucial that i had to choose if i were to live and make do or die a stubborn person... you have a choice to start to live or end your life...(mind you i'm stubborn by nature) ... cos dying is very easy... as easy as being born...but what happens before or after your decision is not your choice... sounds unfair.. but it is good for us...

So this! this... help me to get thru when the going gets tough... besides... we all have a reason to live... and that reason is to better our soul... via conditioning and culturing...

Everything has an answer... its all got to do with whether you are willing to see it and accept it...

Have faith shanti... have faith...
Give fate a fighting chance...

i blogged @
11:21 AM

It's My say

Henceforth, i make a promise..

To respect myself
To know my worth
To treasure my integrity
To choose my faith
To never be deterred by emotions
To never stumble in the name of love
To never question hardship
To never ever entrust my heart
Upon one who knows not it's worth

The One & ONLI

quoted...

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Monday, September 17, 2007

It's My say

The One & ONLI

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